1/20/2013

Ghost World

As much as it is essential, it is difficult. Social networking, photo sites, updating website and resume, blog, paying bills and rent, adjusting invoices, doing taxes, continuing education, creating personal work, twittering, researching, writing your screenplay, finding directions, and even maintaining health stress the modern man and woman. Either we go faster or we should lose some of the cards. But what if you feel you can't afford to lose any cards? You sleep and dream of balancing those cards continuously.

1/20/13
But I have lost cards. Valuable cards. I can honestly say that the social network has hurt me in vast personal ways. It has changed me and my perceptions of others. People who I thought were friends and supporters are neither. I cannot find love, spirit and self through the mirror of the other. A base, shallow and somewhat nihilistic world is given back to you. And you feel invisible, dead, hollow, and worthless to everyone. It is a living Ghost World. So, like Enid, I have to take that bus down the road to art school and leave the other behind... and find meaning where there is none. To find self. To learn to love myself. Again.

That there. That's not me.
I go where I please.
I walk through walls.
I float down the Liffey.
I'm not here. This isn't happening.

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